


My First True Love

by SerArthurHeath



Series: Choices: alternate Choices [2]
Category: My Two First Loves (Visual Novel)
Genre: Best Friends, Cunnilingus, F/F, First Time, Lemon, Lesbian Sex, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:47:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27048211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SerArthurHeath/pseuds/SerArthurHeath
Summary: Emma has finally worked out what she wants, and is acting on it. And what she wants is her best friend, Ava LawrenceAfter months of indecision from her and patience and confusion from the other, the two share their first time together.
Relationships: Best Friend/Main Character (My Two First Loves)
Series: Choices: alternate Choices [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140905
Kudos: 16





	My First True Love

**Author's Note:**

> Written largely due to the frustration of how PB have handled this particular Romantic option.
> 
> One shot but may add a follow up

As we crept upstairs together, my foot fell on the old dud step I'd learnt to avoid years ago. A creak reverberated through the entire house.

Ava giggled into her muffling hand. "Quiet!" She whispered straight into my ear, sending shivers straight down my spine that warmed my gut. "You'll wake my parents."

I'd slept over at Ava's house a dozen times or more, and Mr and Mrs Lawrence wouldn't mind if they found me here in the morning, but things had changed a little since my last sleepover. Many things. 

I took more care over the last few stairs as Ava pulled me behind her and daintily dragged us both into her room with the precision of a ballet dancer. As soon as she had carefully, painstakingly eased the door shut, blessedly silent, she smiled at me. And pulled me into the most mind-bending kiss of my life. 

You see, as of (depending on how you looked at it) either the last few days or tonight, Ava Lawrence wasn't just my girlfriend. She was my  **girl** friend. After months of heartache and heartbreak and soul searching, I had discovered what I wanted, and I had "found" my third "love" but first true love. It was someone I had always had, the finding was something that had had to happen inside me. 

She embraced my lips with her mouth, starting sweet and lingering like our first kiss, the breaking of a wave inside us that had risen up and carried us helpless in its wake months ago. Maybe longer. Her mouth tasted of cocoa and vanilla chapstick and some subtle sweet fruit that I could already only describe as "Ava". Her perfume, the same zesty aroma she had worn forever, it filled my nose, so I could breathe in only her. Then the kiss deepened, her exploring tongue caressing my own, her hands pulling me deep into her so that I could feel the swell of her curves against my body, feel the heat seeping off her skin. I realised as she held me tight, as I hugged back, finally embracing what we had and what it meant for me, that her hands had slipped slightly down my back, were almost touching my butt-cheeks. I realised that I wanted them to.

The kiss broke apart by mutual decision, both of us burning up our air with the voracious hunger we had applied to the kiss, panting for breath. I rested by laying my cheek on her shoulder, cushioned by soft hair, wanting to make it plain that I needed to stay physically close to her. That my mind was made up and I wasn't going to mess her around any more.

"Emma, shall we lie down on the bed together?"

_ Yes, please _ . My body, changing so much lately, had become hungry for this intimacy, hadn't really known what it had been missing until I had pieced together how Ava made me feel, the pure emotional effect she had on my heart that the boys simply didn't. My heart had raced hard and fast and I felt the rush of blood below when they'd held me close, though hands on covered body parts were as far as we'd ever gotten, but it hadn't sang like it always had done when Ava smiled at me or held my hand. It had taken so long to make the connection between the two situations in my head, but the second I had kissed Ava tonight everything had been clearer.

I had always loved her as a friend, she had always been dear to me and made my life so much brighter in every way. Spending time with her was a balm for my torn mind and weary spirit and her smile made me happier than anything else in the world. Finding out that that physical rush I had felt with Noah or Mason, the one that left me unable to choose between the two boys who both made me feel so alive, existed with her as well, that had made me understand. 

I liked boys. And girls. And with Ava I could have not only the emotional, the pure link between us where we would do anything for each other, but also the physical. Those jumps in my belly when she caught my gaze were attraction. I fancied her, and with her I could have the best of all worlds in a way that made my choice between the guys feel superficial and bland. 

In that flight of thought, I had joined her on the bed, the two of us both just in jeans and shirts now, our sweaters discarded, no longer needed in this room that felt searingly hot now. The winter evening had been freezing, perfect for ice-skating together and using the romance to finally spurt out my long fumbled words of confession to her. That I wanted her, only her. Ava's room was boiling, not helped by the heat rolling off both of our bodies, burning with passion. 

We just lay and held each other for a time, enjoying the feel of being together.

"Hey, Emma? I just want to let you know we can do more if you want to, but if it's too soon then we can just lie here together. I've got what I wanted, you, and anything that happens after this we will explore together, at your pace." That came out awkwardly. I got it. She had been sure about her feelings for a lot longer than I had (and had probably been here before with Bayla, but I didn't want to think about that) and didn't want to rush me or pressure me into this. But I felt no pressure, no fear with her. This was my best friend and I trusted her. Completely.

And I wanted her. I wanted her so badly, finally defining the shape of the jealousy, the gut-wrenching sadness I had felt when I had seen her with Bayla and even before that with Mason. I'd thought I was jealous of her then, though I'd fought my unwelcome feelings as hard as I could, but now I knew I had been jealous and envious of them both. I knew that every tingle I had felt when we touched was my body and heart getting ahead of my stupid slow brain: it had been the last to realise that I fancied her. And the safety and warmth she made me feel, I knew now that that was the seed of love.

I had thought about this a lot, and I wanted to be physical with someone for the first time, with her. Maybe it was soon, but my body was desperate to feel her and I knew she wanted it and that she deserved it and it was mine to give.

I silenced her doubts with a kiss that obliterated everything else, and made it clear that touching was very much encouraged, gently cupping her bum. It was perfect, different to Noah's but still strong and athletic, equally soft though, yielding as I squeezed gently. I had always looked at her ass, to be honest, comparing it against my own rounder one though she promised me she'd prefer mine. She had mine now, following suit with urgency, grabbing me on my cheeks and immediately driving my desire into a new gear. 

I take anything this girl wanted to give me tonight, and give her my everything.

We kissed more and more boldly, exploring areas of our bodies in the privacy of her room that had been to risqué before, and I revelled in her reaction as I discovered she loved to be kissed on the neck, the collar, behind her ear. It turned out I loved my tummy being kissed, the sensation as she bunched up my top just below my breasts and peppered my belly with soft pecks one of melting inside. I had never, ever felt so warm. 

She asked me a question with her eyes, brows raising a touch, as she moved one hand up beneath the surface of my half-rolled shirt. I knew what she meant, and I nodded then groaned, cutting it off as I remembered where I was, when her hand caressed my breast on top of my bra. This was as far as I'd ever been with anyone, but I wanted so much more now. Quickly, my bra was unfastened and I felt almost paralysed with sensation, in a good way, helpless and pleasure built in my candidly pointy nipple with Ava's hands delicately holding my breasts, thumbs rolling over the points. 

"I first had the thought about how nice it would be to touch these beauties a long, long time ago, long before I had accepted what I felt. They are every bit as wonderful as I'd expected."

"You… you're wonderful!" Smooth line, not, but thinking was hard. Ava's mouth engulfed the skin of my throat, sucking insistently, and it became impossible. I mewled, a sound I wasn't previously aware a human could make. 

"Can I see all of you, Emma my darling? I refused to let myself before when we changed together, it felt like a betrayal of trust, and I've wanted to for so long…"

Frantically I stripped, set ablaze by the hunger and fire in Ava's eyes as I saw them trace my body, lingering on my bust and legs and coming back up to look between them.

I felt self-conscious. Not because I was naked or she was staring at me, that made me feel more powerful than I'd ever felt in my life, knowing I could make another person stare like that. But though I usually trimmed, I didn't shave or wax below and I was a little longer than usual. I had wanted to make my bush prettier, not to shave it off as that would raise awkward questions if anyone at home noticed, but I hadn't expected to end up here tonight. One of my fingers instinctively fiddled with the curls there, and gently as anything, Ava took my hand and stopped me. "I think it's super sexy. Naturally you." She obviously knew what I was thinking, then. I kissed her again, her sweetness and my gratitude making me more restless. Horny, though that was a word I had never applied to myself before. 

"Please can I see you, too? I've always thought you were the most beautiful girl in school, and I want to make myself believe that something so perfect is happening to me, to see it with my own eyes." 

_ That was corny. _

The shy smile, so unlike the dynamic confidence Ava always portrayed, that I got in return made my heart skip a beat. And then, slowly and sexily unlike my own pathetic need to get naked as quickly as possible, she stripped her clothes off. Fluidly lifting her top over her head, catching for a moment as her arms came out of it and I got a perfect view of her swelling chest and her smooth armpits (thank God I had shaved there and my legs today). One second later, I blinked and her bra was lying on the floor, two nipples so vividly pink I could barely believe them in their places. Another second, and she'd started to shimmy out of her cute jeans the rhythmic jiggling of her hips hypnotising me. Finally, she sat on my lap, and put my hands on the sides of her panties, and used them as a tool to slip them down, gently pulling them as she gyrated into me. Her back felt like fire brushing up against nipples so sensitive they almost hurt with the pure heat and light friction. Her underwear was unbelievably soft, her skin even softer as she pushed into my lap, teasing my slightly parted thighs. I was suddenly, unignorably, erotically aware that they felt wet and I had no idea if it was from me or her. Once she had helped me help her out of the last of her clothes, sliding them below her knees where she flicked them off with an elegant kick, she moved my hands to her breasts and on reflex, driven by some primal urge, I kneaded them lightly.

Her moan then was the sexiest sound I had ever heard. 

We were completely naked to each other, skin on skin, the room steaming with heat and desire. She rubbed her pert bum into me again, parting my pliant legs a little so that I could feel just how close she was to grinding on my most sensitive spot. "Kiss me," she whispered, and I obeyed, drawn to the back of her shoulder. She sighed then with the grace of the cheerleader we had once both been, she dismounted, twirled and sat back on me, her breasts now mashing into mine, her lips crashing into my mouth, hands in my hair, hands on my back, driving me wild with touch after touch. As she became more and more frantic, one hand slipped to my front, making me whine into her mouth as she touched my cheek, drew a fingernail down my neck, tweaked my nipple then popped the finger into her mouth then mine. I sucked reflexively, the sensation feeling natural and liberating. Suddenly it was back on my little peak, gliding around it and rolling over it, the slick wetness so exquisite that I would have cried out had she not been filling my mouth entirely. The damp finger drifted down and down, tracing my ribs and my abs and reaching my hairline, softly stroking, petting me until my legs slipped further open. She was seated on one of my thighs now, and I could feel the molten gold pouring out, soaking my leg, telling me how excited she was for me, making me so excited I could barely breathe. Her finger came closer and closer to my centre until…

Just as it made contact, some fear exploded into me and I pulled away. Not completely, but a little, enough to break the kiss and shatter the mood.

Ava looked at me, openly hurt, but also worried. Torn between her past doubts about what I felt about her and her eternal wish to put me first, her utter care for me. She deserved so much, she had so much love in her heart that it burned me, seared my soul to see her so viscerally upset and to know that it was my fault. 

I immediately pulled me towards her, to show her that it was just a reaction, that I still wanted this, but she resisted. "Is it me? Are you scared, or repulsed, or whatever, because it's me your friend? Or because it's your first time with a woman?"

_ Ah, so that's her fear. _

My fault too, given how long and tortuous our route to this point had been. But I could answer that question easily.

"I'm whatever, Ava. I'm not disgusted or scared, just nervous. This is my first time, period."

Her beautiful sea-grey eyes widened, hurt replaced by wonder and shock. "You mean, you and Mason didn't..? Or Noah?" 

Shaking my head I blushed. "No. We, um, snuggled close, and I wanted to, but I was going to save myself until I was sure I was in love, and even just, um, other body bits was more intimate than I wanted to rush into… but I'm ready now. I want this. I'm just worried I'll do something wrong, or it'll hurt" 

Her gaze was pure affection now. "I promise, I'll never hurt you, and if you want to stop, we'll stop. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions and I shouldn't get upset by a no, but I hadn't even thought… I was sure that you would have…"

She stopped suddenly. "Wait. You were waiting until you thought you were in love? Does that mean what I think it does?"

_ Oh. Well, I guess that had come out hadn't it? _ It was true though. I had loved Ava for a long long time, it was only now that I had recognized the romantic love in that. Love comes in many forms but as soon as I had accepted the depth of my attraction to her, body and wonderful spirit, I realised that I was deeply, deeply in love with her.

I loved the boys too, but the romantic part had died away from that. Some part of me still knew I found them attractive but my mind and soul had fixed onto Ava now and the erotic love I once felt had simmered down (or changed I guess, it was no less powerful or consuming, only different. Less overtly physical) to that I would feel for a brother. 

Ava though, I loved in every way. It felt incestuous to consider like that, but the friendship, the sisterly feelings we shared, the feeling of a kindred spirit; none of those things had been replaced or superceded. Just added to. With a passion my body could barely contain and it terrified me how little control I felt I had over myself right now. So why not hand that control over to Ava, the person I trusted the most?

"It's true. I love you, and I want to you be my first, right now."

And with that Ava burst into floods of tears, muffling her sobs on my shoulder as she hugged me so tightly I felt ribs creak. "Ava, are you ok?"

It took a while for her to compose herself enough to respond.

"Yes," she sniffed eventually, "I'm just so happy, happier than I can ever remember being. I love you too, I have done for ages, and I can't believe this is happening. Is this some dream I'm having, stuck back months ago when I realised how I felt about girls? About you? Because it's always been you. Bayla knew it, that's why she became so pushy and tried to make you jealous and make out with me in places I wasn't comfortable doing it. Why we broke it off." Suddenly her face fell, pale and stricken. "Emma, this isn't my first time, nor my second, nor my first time with a girl. You must think I'm such a slut, throwing myself away on people I'm not even sure I like or who were as clearly using me as a substitute for you as I was, whilst you waited until it was special."

It was my turn to hush her. I brushed the tears from her cheeks and kept brushing her face, "That's not true, and there's nothing wrong with it. I don't care, and all it means is that I get someone who knows what they are doing for my first time, and it makes me feel safe."

Ava nearly cried again, but eventually her face split in two with a giant smile. "Well, there's that at least. Hopefully you like it more than my first - Mason was sweet but it basically cemented that I had no interest in doing with boys."

Her mischievous spark had come back as had that hunger. "I'm going to make you feel so good, baby, but if it's too much just stop me." And with that, her hand snaked back down, the other pushing me down by my chest, not hard but firmly enough that it was clear what I was expected to do. 

Her fingers toyed with my hairline, as her lips covered every inch of my torso, broken up by little prayers and promises. "You have no…" a kiss to the cheek, "idea how long…" a kiss to the hollow of my neck, "I've wanted this. How I wished…" a kiss to the swell of my breast now and a gasp from me. Her hand flew down to my inner thigh and ghosted upwards as she continued. "that Bayla was you when we kissed." Her one hand was just at the seam of my leg and my centre, the other on one breast just before she engulfed my opposite, trying to fit as much of it as she could in her ravenous, searing mouth. She then slid up so just the nipple stood between her lips and licked away, now suckling, now nipping until I realised I was moaning out loud, not loudly but enough that she had to shhh me again. "If you make any more sound I'm going to have to gag you. Maybe that's what you want, your perfumed underwear in your mouth, reminding you physically how much you want me. Or mine." I gave a silent cry there, feeling like my insides had been replaced with luxuriant molten chocolate, my vagina a volcano coming close to eruption. She kept going, telling me what she had dreamed of doing to me and what she was going to do to me, the dirty talk both intensely arousing and empowering that this girl, this incredible angel, was moved so strongly by me, had wanted me so much. It was also sweet, a warning about what to expect. It made me hers, utterly. I would have trusted her to do anything to me.

What she did do was tend to my boobs so tenderly I could hardly believe that the feelings inside me could get better though I knew they would. I had orgasmed before, of course I had, had masturbated though I always felt a little guilty doing it. Maybe because for months I had done so thinking about my friends - Mason, then Noah, then increasingly and exclusively Ava, the girl I had for real now. But I had never felt this wound up, this sensual beforehand. Never been brought to the brink emotionally and deep inside, and in a way it was almost as wonderful, in an exquisite, almost torturous way, as the climax. I felt so cared for and so desired. Lusted after. Loved. 

It was like a storm of fire and water swirling inside me.

Then finally, kisses raining down on my pelvis, her hand moved and my world shifted. Pausing to give me a second to say no, she entered the valley of my mound, skirting agonisingly close to my now swollen, needy clit. 

I couldn't believe how wet I was.

She excruciatingly slowly parted my lips and towards my summit and the cavern and the bubbling magma within. Then she entered me, carefully.

It was an incomparable experience, the feeling of knowing someone else was in me, was a part of my body now, but welcome there. It didn't feel dirty like some small part of me worried it might, but cleansing. Binding us together. Divine. 

It also physically felt really, really good, a stab of pleasure going right through me. "Is this ok?"

I could only nod, biting my lip with mixed joy and anticipation. And she started to move, slowly at first, only a few inches in and out, inside me, building up a pressure in my mound that was unbearable, before, slowly so I could feedback, adding a second finger. 

I felt so full and it felt so right. Like I was complete. I had never done this to myself, and in some ways I was stunned at what I had been missing out on but I was glad I was experiencing even this with her. I begged her, whispering fervently, for more, and she gave it to me. First, incredibly delicately and putting a plain pillow case beneath me first, she broke my hymen, a sharp pain arising from that but one soon overcome by the joy of the situation, and her soothing touch inside me and the balm of her lips on my skin. Then she built me up to smash me to pieces, going faster and faster until I could hear the profane noise of squelching within me and the grunting outside of me. Then she touched me, somewhere deep inside with those fingers whilst she moved her other thumb straight to my little nub, shattering my existence, into starlight and rainbows and pure raw emotion and putting me back together in a new image. One who would never forget this moment with Ava.

_ I want this forever _ , I thought as I recovered in her arms, her pleased smile singing straight to my heart. "That looked good." Again, she kissed me on the lips, exuding reassurance and patience. "We don't have to do anything else. We can stop and cuddle if you don't feel comfortable doing any more."

Sweet. But I did feel comfortable. What I didn't feel was satisfied - I wanted more of Ava, wanted to make it clear to her and to myself that I wanted her, that I knew I was doing this with a girl and that was more than "no big deal". That it was amazing, and special, and that I would never be ashamed of us. I wanted… 

"I want to taste you."

The look on her face now was one of hopeful bliss, some shyness also creeping back in. It was more than she'd hoped for, but it was honestly what I wanted. 

I'd been curious, to be honest, in the increasing number of dreams and conscious visions of Ava together with me, about what this would be like. Everything else was something a girl could experience with a man or with herself, though of course it was different. Ava's kisses were better than either boy's had been, ranging from a soft paintbrush filling in the blanks in my feelings to a sledgehammer smashing my conscious mind, for one thing. But this, this was unique. 

As much as I had thought, and when everyone was asleep read erotic stories and seen pictures and even very rarely, with my headphones in, watched videos, of "intimacy" with men, as much as it still turned me on, I had never felt any desire to suck one of their thingies. It just didn't appeal, and I had never thought of the actual apparatus as particularly attractive. More a tool for the actual sharing of love.

I had thought of tasting Ava's vagina though. What it would smell like, feel like, taste like. And now that I saw it, Ava flopping back and parting her legs, I realised it was truly beautiful. Delicate like a shell peeking open, everything neat and elegant. 

Maybe I did prefer girls to boys then, or at least their bits? It didn't matter, wouldn't matter practically ever again, I hoped (though my attraction and feelings for men would always be a part of me that I wanted to get to know, so I could know myself in this point where everything was confusing): right now I preferred Ava to the entire world and I wouldn't mess it up again by bringing anyone else into it.

I knew enough not to jump straight in, exploring the rest of her athletic, wonderful body just as she had done me, savouring her moans as I sucked on her breasts and stroked her back and nibbled at her thighs. Eventually, Ava pleading for it, we ended up where we both wanted. 

Like her nipples, an almost florid pink, symmetrical and inviting, her sex was just inches from my mouth. Unlike me, she had just a small triangle of trimmed hair. A tiny part of me wondered if Bayla had liked her like that, but I crushed it.  _ I  _ liked her like that, but what mattered was whether she did. She was just letting me into her special place, not giving me the keys. 

The scent was gorgeous, earthy and floral all at once, filling my world, and the whimpering she made as I edged closer and closer nearly made me melt once more. It was so hot, I could feel the heat on my face, and she shivered as she felt my breath on her thighs and her sex. Then I licked, and didn't stop licking. 

The answer to what tasting Ava would be like was "phenomenal". Every aspect of it, from the subtle tart tang that was nothing like the fishiness that some of the girls had joked about whenever lesbians came up as a lunch table topic, to the paradoxical sticky slickness, the feeling of her pushing into me whether I grazed her big, juicy clitoris (I estimated it was bigger than mine), lapped at her petal-like lips or probed into her little tunnel. Most of all, it was seeing and feeling her, and sensing, somehow, her as I brought her closer and closer to her climax, working harder and faster, desperate to give her the prize she deserved so much. 

When she came, she bit down on her own hand and jerked into my face, now buried deep between her legs. The tension in her thighs and her ass, where both my hands rested, flared and then vanished into an utter laxness, and her hands on my head drew me in, making her vulva, her "pussy" as she had called it whilst she begged me to eat her out, my universe for that moment. Right at the end, she sprayed something into my mouth, tasting of her only even stronger. I hadn't known girls did that, but then I guess I knew very little about this. I had just been thinking in my fantasies about what I would like Ava to do to me and tried to do the same to her. 

Making her orgasm like that, it was even better than my own, felt so selfless even though it was exactly what I had wanted. 

I never wanted this to stop.

We just lay there, until we had lived this moment and its memory to its fullest, then, staying undressed, knowing we'd have questions to answer in the morning, washing to sneak before her parents smelled the bed or the room, showers to wipe away the evidence on our skin, calls to make to my own father (though I had messaged him to say I was sleeping over at Ava's). Lots to worry about, but later. For now we just savoured what we had, and what we hoped would last, and the completing feel of the touch of each other's naked skin on skin.

I lay there as I realised after much consternation about My First Two Loves, I had somehow found, right in plain sight, My First (and only?) True Love. 


End file.
